fracturedrp | Pregnant Women Celebrate Mother's Day Right?

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Pregnant Women Celebrate Mother's Day Right?

When: Moving Day Plot
Who: Owen Harper

wanker4life and Liz Sherman

lizfirestarter
Where: The Torchwood Compound

What:

"And, here we go the universe has gone to try to top itself off again." Owen's busy in the 'apartment' or whatever they want to call it now. He's busy trying to get one pole attached to the ceiling in the family room of the home and he's got a bunch of flowers, sparkling grape juice and other nice things to help celebrate this 'new' holiday.

He looks up at the pole and he gives it a good test. "Looks about right. Liz!" Owen calls out to her and he's not about to share the orders he's overheard about them going to find a source of bad shit happening. He's annoyed about the loss of some valued items, plasma screen, computers, medical gear and others to this damn universal madness.

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It's Sunday, damn it. Sunday. The day of rest and all Liz wants is to rest. Of course all the banging around wakes her up, but she figures maybe Owen's trying to cook or (God forbid) clean. She'll get out of bed is she smells smoke or hears him yell 'Fire!' or something.

Then he calls her by name and she's got no choice but to get up and see what he's on about. "Owen...I was sleeping, and you told me I was supposed to get more sleep so..." She stops dead, her jaw hanging open.

"The hell is that?" She points at the very familiar looking pole before folding her arms with a scowl. "Tell me that's to tie your stupid dog to when we're doing our thing," she gestures to the bedroom. "so he stops 'interrupting'. Please." She's not stupid though. Doesn't take a genius to figure out that pole is in fact NOT for Patch harnessing duty.

"Listen, I was just...using the tools I had at my disposal," She walks over and looks the pole up and down. "I was working. I was trying to keep you from getting eaten by zombies. Again."

Finally, after she reaches out and spins around the pole a bit, hanging on with her hand Liz shakes her head and smiles, trying not to laugh. She can be a good sport about this. "I totally brought this on myself, didn't I?"

There was nothing more to do at this point he managed to do a near 1950's autopsy on the remains of the zombies that were brought back from the strip club the night before.

Owen was up, he couldn't sleep and sometimes it seems normal for him. He was busy with a drill and screwdriver, the pole is in place and he looks over his shoulder to see Liz finally come out. "Course you need more sleep love, but isn't this that holiday you lot celebrate so us men get to buy women things like flowers, perfume and sparkly things."

He'll save the sparkly thing for later and he goes to test the pole out himself. "I figure it'll keep things here fun and besides it's a good way to get your figure back." He makes some of his own strip music and he plays around the pole. "Course you were and I figured this would be a good way to keep anything from eating me."

She shakes her head again, adding an eyeroll to the mix just to tease him. "It's Mothers Day," Liz says matter of factly. "And you..." she reaches out and pulls him close. "Have somehow managed to make a day I'd dreaded and wanted to forget even existed," She eyes the pole again and snickers. "Unforgettable. But we are not telling our kid about this, you got me?"

Then there's the comment about her figure, which is going to earn Owen a shove. A playful one, but a shove all the same. "Did you just imply I'm not in peak physical condition?" Liz pulls back and assumes a very serious expression. "I look amazing. I will look amazing." She says smugly, all while trying to keep a straight face. "If anyone is out of shape it's you. " she looks him over very slowly thoughtfully. "Yup. I'm going to have to make you use this thing to keep in shape." Liz says with a firm nod.

"Unless, you want to see what we both could do with this thing." There's more than a hint of suggestion in her voice. What they say about being pregnant and hormonal making a woman horny all the time. It's totally true. "We could really make this day unforgettable if we put our mind to it, don't you think?"

Owen looks at the pole and he makes sure it's screwed the the wooden support beam. At least they're overlooking the beach and unless people want a strange show privacy is king. "Yes, and this is the perfect Mother's Day gift. The little wanker will enjoy it when he gets older." Owen seems to know this one for a fact.

"No, but having kids tears up the body. Just wait until the belly comes and you start..." He's shoved and he gives her a tiny shove back. "Getting stretch marks, swollen ankles and well just ask Alisa about that much." He's heard Jack's remarks about his abs countless times and he gives Liz a snort. "My body is just fine, it's sexy!"

He tests the pole to see it will hold him, it holds. "Let's give it a shot shall we? I did a great job and installed it according to the instructions."

"You're kidding. Tell me you're kidding. No kid of mine is enjoying a stripper pole in their own home." Liz actually wonders how long they'll be staying in one place, anyway. Will they even be here when she gives birth, or will there be an entirely new place that they're needed at by then? "Actually," She turns serious a moment. "If it means we get to stay someplace for...years, it might be okay. Maybe."

Then Owen has to mention all the less desirable side effects of pregnancy. "All that shit's going to happen to me?" Liz asks accusingly, but she's still kidding and the almost smile might give it away. She's read the books, she knows what's going to happen. The fact Owen's fully aware of it, too, and not freaking out is a comfort in it's own way. "I'm going to turn into some swollen, fat, cranky bitch because you knocked me up?" How she's managing to pretend to start a fight and not burst into a giggle fit is some sort of miracle.

"You know what..." she says sternly as she leans against the pole, getting so close to Owen's lips she can almost touch them, but she won't. "I take it back. That would be rewarding you and you just completely ruined my day, so you are not getting rewarded until you make it up to me." And that right there is a challenge, should Owen chose to accept it.

Owen knows this likely won't be their last place and after seeing what everyone else has been moaning about he knows work will require traveling soon. "I wouldn't bet on it. Jack's positive this is our HUB even if we'll be traveling on occasion. He described it as Timey-Whimey when you're in the TARDIS simply because you're standing outside of time or something." He glances at the pole and he's going to seriously push Jack on 'sitting' still.

"Yes, all of those things will happen. Oh, I'm not going to mention the disgusting things." Owen, looks at the flowers and the little gift bag. He hands them over to Liz to distract her from the group pole dance. "Got you something else, oh you know me. I just couldn't stop at the strip pole."

He leans there, the bag in his hand and he goes to press his lips against hers. "What? The two of us on that pole?"

"How the hell do you stand outside time?" Nice job trying to change the subject, Owen, but it's not going to work. In fact, it only make Liz more nervous, which makes her more snarky, or flirty or pouncy or whatever the hell this is. Probably a weird combination of all three.

"Yes, no mentioning the disgusting things," Liz stops a moment when he hands over the flowers and the small bag, then casually chucks them behind her to land on the sofa. Not that she doesn't appreciate then but she's not exactly in a romantic mood at the moment. She's got other things on her mind that involve him and her and a shiny new stripper pole.

"What, you mean to tell my you didn't think about all the crazy, kinky stuff we could do with this thing while you were installing it?" Because she can think of plenty of thing, and still is and it's going to lead to Owen getting pounced while Liz keeps one arm wrapped around that 'present' he just put in their living room.

She's almost, almost doesn't notice the sound of drywall cracking above them because she's so wrapped up in showing Owen just how much she appreciates the fact he took the time to make Mothers Day perfect by trying to get him undressed as quickly as humanly possible.

That is until she looks up and says, "Please tell me you remembered to mount this thing in one of the studs." And she'd realize what a double entendre that was if she wasn't busy trying to dodge falling chunks of ceiling.

"It's fucking complicated so I don't ask." Owen says, and he really was trying to divert things away from him having to dance on that pole. It didn't look the least bit stable. Owen noticed Liz was exceptionally horny as of late and he didn't mind it one bit.

He's sure Liz knows all about those and he watches the bag with the pendant roll on the couch. "I thought you might like the gift." There's a few other little trinkets in there for a normal gal like Liz.

Owen looks at the basic screwdriver and then he holds it up in the air. "Like? What watching me turn a screw and hefting a pole?" He's trying his hand at this and men aren't made for stripper poles in his mind. Period.

Then Liz goes to join him and he hears the crack, studs? Who said anything about studs. "What? You seriously didn't think.." Then the pole along with a good bit of the ceiling come crashing down into the living room. Owen's left standing there with plaster and something resembling an Italian loafer come falling down. "Oh, fuck! You do know Patrick and Ianto live above us right?"

"Later, we have lots of time." Liz will open and adore the gifts later, Owen. Promise. She's just got other more pressing matters on her mind right now. First things first. She snickers and tosses the screwdriver to the couch with the rest of the stuff. "Too bad you couldn't have recorded it, bet it was really hot, you being all Mr. Home Improvement."

There's a fleeting moment of acting out some normal couple type fantasy in Liz's head until Owen's handman skills are proved less than spectacular. "Owen..." Liz is clinging to him a bit like he's her knight in shining armor and she's a helpless princess, the whole idea of the sky falling freaking her out a bit. She recovers her usual attitude fast enough though. "You are not allowed to put the baby crib together, you got me?"

She lets Owen go and ties up her robe to sure it's covering all the important bits before walking over to the mess that used to be their ceiling. She pulls a shocked face when she see's Ianto's shoe has fallen though. "The hell kind of crappy mansion did Jack buy that it can be brought down by a stripper pole from Costco?" Liz asks as she looks up at the hole. "Seriously, this is California. There's earthquakes all the time. What is this shit?"

"Yeah, alright later." Owen, was having lots of fun putting the pole up and he looks at the weight restrictions on the box. "Alright, so there's a limit on these things. I hate to be the owner of a flat who's got a 700lb newbie trying her stuff." Owen shudders violently at the idea and he closes his eyes. "Ugh! I just gave myself a horrible mental image."

He calls up to see if Ianto's up stairs. "Ianto! Just put a bit of duct table and the coffee table on top. Jack won't notice it." Owen's lucky Ianto's in the HUB getting things organized from the move. He then looks at Liz with a pouty look. "I'm perfectly fine with power tools. I'm a fucking doctor for crying out loud. I can read and figure out how to put slot A into slot F."

Harper was in an undershirt and a pair of jeans, he's looking at the mess in the ceiling again. "I say we put more than the recommended weight on the pole and we'll the results happened." He peers down at the piece of dry wall and he snorts. "I forgot to look for the studs so it's my fault."

"Are you implying you and me weigh more than 700 pounds..." Liz has to tease Owen, other wise she's going to have a panic attack about explaining to Ianto why he and Patrick have a hole in their floor and to Jack why there's a hole in his house. "Maybe we can tell them one of us misfired our gun or something." That would be a hell of a lot less embarrassing than a stripper poll mishap.

"It's Ianto. He's not going to do that." Liz smacks Owen in the arm before laughing a bit more. "And you're brilliant and amazing and," Yup, Liz is getting to the point she can say it without hesitation. "I love you but you can't do handy man stuff. You didn't even buy paint for the nursery at our old place, remember?"

"Don't worry about it. It's...funny. A story we can look back on when we're way too old to be playing on stripper poles." Liz smile before pulling Owen over to the sofa where all the presents ended up. "Flowers," she tries to hide that him doing something so sweet still makes her blush like mad. "...very traditional Mothers Day gift."

Then there's the little bag, with the amazing necklace. Liz smirks and shakes her head, knowing Owen's probably picking on her about making him use the pink water gun when they had to fight that spider thing just a bit. It's beautiful, almost too beautiful for her to even see herself wearing, but perfect all the same. "Two necklaces..." she says thoughtfully as she takes off the necklace he gave her on Valentines Day that she still hardly ever takes off.

"You're spoiling me, you know that, right?" Liz says trying to hide that she's blushing even more is she holds both out between her and Owen. "Which one am I supposed to wear when?"

"Yes, we're two big fat fuckers." Owen teases back and he looks at the dry wall on the couch. "Maybe an earthquake happened and made the ceiling all dodgy." He dusts the couch off so he can sit down and flop he does. He dusts a spot off for Liz and he laughs a bit. "Ianto's been stuck in that new HUB putting all of our old useful and useless shit in their place. We can get Patrick to fix it but Ianto won't be able to leave it."

Owen knows Ianto well the poor git with his OCD won't do a rug, duct tape and a table to cover it up. "I'll wait.. never mind..." Owen's mobile isn't working and HUB comms are down. "We'll buy paint for this place. What colors or should we figure out what's gonna happen first?"

Growing old? Owen knows that doesn't happen with Torchwood and with how things have been it just gets a bit of a frown from Owen. "Yeah, we'll have to tell the kids this one when they're old enough. Your Mum and Dad were being silly, and took Uncle Jack's house down with a Tesco's stripper pole."

Then he looks over to see Liz finally open up the gift he got her, he didn't forget the spider events with that weird little Doctor. "Yeah, two of them. Well you can change them up a bit. One day you want a heart and another day you're feeling spidery."

Liz ignored the comment about them being fat because Owen damn well better be kidding. "We should be helping Ianto but...I never get time alone with you." And yes, Liz enjoys non working time with Owen more than she'll admit to anyone but him. She's getting down right used to this coupling thing. Enjoying it even.

"I'll talk to him, OK? It's my present so it's my fault technically. Don't worry about it." Liz hmms and looks at the second room that houses boxes that need to be unpacked before it becomes a nursery. "Yellow, or green. Something neutral." She is holding out hope that the Doctor was right in his hunch about a boy, because the idea of dealing with a small version of Owen is easier than dealing with a small version of herself. She snorts and shakes her head. "Kids? Plural?" It's impossible to hide the tone of worry in her voice. "We should make sure we don't ruin this one first, don't you think?"

"This is getting to be a habit of yours, Dr. Harper. Buying me stuff that normal girls like." She laughs lightly, putting the new much more sparkley pendant on. "I feel spidery. Or...animally. Not sure." She says before leaning over for a kiss. "Might just be you making me feel this way, though." And maybe that's why Owen is continuing with the jewelry, it really does make Liz feel like she's the center of the universe, even if it ordinarily freaks her out.

"We should see about breakfast. Maybe hit a store for something to patch up that hole after."

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